How to Win Friends and Influence People covers a lot of ideas. A good way to understand the book is to learn the general principles underlying the book. Then we’ll cover a checklist for two common situations: 1) how to approach arguments, 2) how to give feedback and change someone else’s behavior.

Principles
People crave the feeling of importance. Make someone feel important and they will think well of you. Diminish someone’s importance and they will resent you.

Appeal to the other person’s interests. Virtually all people care more about what they want than what you want.

You wouldn’t go fishing with cheesecake as a lure, since fish don’t like cheesecake. Go fishing with worms.

Keep asking yourself - “what is it that this person wants?”

Everyone has something they can teach you, and you benefit by figuring out what that is. This belief leads to a genuine interest and appreciation for other people.

Angry people are often angry because they feel unheard. Once you sympathize with them, they will soften their anger substantially.

Approach people with a positive demeanor. Smile and be happy.

A person’s name is the most important word in any language to them. Use it often and respect it.

Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. Ask questions that they’ll enjoy answering.

To influence people to do things, praise and appreciation are more effective than orders.

Don’t start by criticizing or complaining. This makes them defensive and rationalize their actions. Instead, praising them lowers their defenses, and they’ll be more receptive to your feedback.

Preface to Revised Edition
How This Book Was Written?And Why
Nine Suggestions on How to Get the Most Out of This Book

PART ONE
Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

1 "If You Want to Gather Honey, Don't Kick Over the Beehive"
2 The Big Secret of Dealing with People
3 "He Who Can Do This Has the Whole World with Him. He Who Cannot Walks a Lonely Way."

PART TWO
Six Ways to Make People Like You

1 Do This and You'll Be Welcome Anywhere
2 A Simple Way to Make a Good First Impression
3 If You Don't Do This, You are Headed for Trouble
4 An Easy Way to Become a Good Conversationalist
5 How to Interest People
6 How to Make People Like You Instantly

PART THREE
How to Win People to Your Way of Thinking

1 You Can't Win an Argument
2 A Sure Way of Making Enemies?And How to Avoid It
3 If You're Wrong, Admit It
4 A Drop of Honey
5 The Secret of Socrates
6 The Safety Valve in Handling Complaints
7 How to Get Cooperation
8 A Formula That Will Work Wonders for You
9 What Everybody Wants
10 An Appeal That Everybody Likes
11 The Movies Do It. TV Does It. Why Don't You Do It?
12 When Nothing Else Works, Try This

PART FOUR
Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

1 If You Must Find Fault, This is the Way to Begin
2 How to Criticize?And Not Be Hated for It
3 Talk About Your Own Mistakes First
4 No One Likes to Take Orders
5 Let the Other Man Save Face
6 How to Spur People On to Success
7 Give a Dog a Good Name
8 Make the Fault Seem Easy to Correct
9 Making People Glad to Do What You Want

A Shortcut to Distinction
by Lowell Thomas